On Saturday Kyle and Kacie went to her High School Senior Prom.  She was absolutely GORGEOUS,  she looked like the embodiment of a princess.  Just glowing and smiling from ear to ear.  As I watched both of them get dressed and ready,  I couldn’t help but feel so proud and yet emotional at the same time. 

     At one point in time I was adjusting Kyle’s vest and tie because they weren’t straight.  He pulled away and said “what are you doing Mom?,  I said I am fixing you, you aren’t straight.”  He countered with “I’m an adult,  I pay my own taxes,  leave me be”!  I finished straightening him and walked away giggling. 

     He may be an adult in his eyes,  and yes he does pay his own taxes.  But he will always be my son.  No matter how old he is. Roots and Wings,  the ability to give your children a strong foundation,  yet at the same time give them the ability to fly away. 

     I fully intended to watch Connor play baseball this afternoon,  but Mother Nature had different ideas.  On the way to the field it began to sprinkle.  I looked at him and said “it is just a passing shower,  coach said that the rain and thunderstorms won’t be here till 6:30. We pulled into the parking lot,  he got out,  grabbed his gear and walked in the sprinkles towards the field.

     I stayed in the car to call
A T & T because his phone had decided to bite the dust today.  While on the phone with the Customer Service Rep the rain became steadily harder and then the thunder started.

     In years of Rec League Ball I have suffered through “swamp ass”.  Where the rain runs off the edges of your umbrella,  down your back into your underwear.  There it forms a puddle,  ie  “swamp ass”.  All while keeping score and trying to keep the book dry, because keeping score on a wet book is pretty fruitless.  I don’t have to do that now that he plays High School Ball.  I am content to stay warm and dry in my car.  Until either the rain stops,  the game is over,  or they call it because it isn’t safe for them to play.
☔☔⚾⚾😉

  

    It is the time of year,  the time where my family’s life seems to endlessly revolve around diamonds.  Not the kind that sparkle,  the kind that make teenage boys knees dirty,  make their hearts pound and and make them run for home.  The baseball diamonds.
     Connor is playing for Franklin County Tech,  mostly 2nd base,  but some Left Field and Short Stop too.  I have watched him play this game,  the game that he loves since 2nd grade.  Starting as a First Baseman,  then as a Pitcher (that is a position that is both terrifying and exciting.)  He has grown up both physically and emotionally,  turning into a young man and quite a mature one at that.
     To watch him put on his uniform,  lace up his cleats,  don his hat and step onto the field is something that makes me proud every time.  He knows how to both win and lose with grace,  how to know that baseball is the greatest sport of his life,  but it isn’t the end all and be all of his life.  It has made him a well rounded young man and turned him into the man that he is today. A young man that I am very proud of, not just on the diamond but off as well.

    

I have had the following motto for as long as I can remember “Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History”.  It is a quote or motto that sums up standing up for what you believe in.  Not being a wallflower or too afraid to have an opinion and voice it.  The quote is attributed to Laurel Thatcher Ulrich a Puliltzer Prize Winning author,  but if you Google the quote it is also attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt,  Anne Boleyn ,  Marilyn Monroe and Anonymous.  It is pretty scary how the Internet can take off with something,  and distort the tru meaning and origin of a quote.  When Mark and I were in Arizona 2 years ago I found a bracelet with this quote engraved on it,  I can look at it every day and it reminds me to stand up for my beliefs and  my ideals.  That if I can defend my actions and they are not violent than I should support them.
     My dad’s favorite quote is “Getting old is not for sissies”,  and now that I am approaching 50, I wholeheartedly agree. Aging is something that I totally prefer to the alternative,  but there are times that it sucks.

     My newest favorite quote isn’t near as nice as the previous 2. It is best shown by its initials FFS,  when spelled out meaning For Fucks Sake.  My version of WTF?  I have also found as I have aged my patience has diminished,  so FFS has become my mantra,  sometimes spoken,  or just quietly running through my head.  So if you see me roll my eyes,  you can bet that I am thinking honestly FFS people???

    We all bend and sway with our friends and groups.  This group likes Rap Music, this group Country and this group Death Metal.  Or maybe with these group of friends you go to eat Chinese,  while the next group it is Mexican.  

     All of those are superficial adjustments that we make when the crowd mentality kicks in.  We don’t want to be the one lone Chinese Food lover in the Mexican group or vice versa.

     The real issue arises when someone tries to change the fundamental principles of who you are, to match what they want you to be. Akin to telling you that the sky is green when we all know that it is blue.  We all need to find our own path to walk in this life,  sometimes the path a little less traveled may be the one that you are more comfortable with.  But maybe you want the 8 Lane super highway,  all hustle and bustle and lots of commotion.  Those are decisions that only we can make. 

     Trying to live someone else’s dream or ideal of you is like trying to squeeze into a pair of jeans that are a tad too small.  They will fit,  but never be really comfortable,  find the life that is like the comfy well worn jeans, it is you,  thru and thru. 

    

     I was just cruising along doing my thing this past weekend,  things were going well.  Then out of the blue Sunday afternoon a migraine arrived.  This was a doozy of a migraine.  It started with nausea, and dizziness like the world wouldn’t stop spinning.  I kept thinking I was gonna toss my cookies at any moment.  Then came the numbness in my hands and fingertips,  a bizarre feeling that never becomes normal.

     I started by taking a shower and popping my migraine meds, and anti-nausea meds,  washing them down with Gatorade. 30 minutes later and the blinding pain and nausea hasn’t abated.  Onto stage 2, the heavier duty anti-nausea meds and more migraine meds,  along with pain meds and more Gatorade.  Finally I sleep because the nausea has abated a bit and the blinding pain has diminished a bit.
     I am very careful about what I eat to keep these debilitating headaches under control.  Minimal processed meats,  no artificial sweeteners,  lots of fresh veggies and fruit and lean protein.  I keep a food journal and nothing that is a trigger has crossed my lips in the passed week.  I am at a loss as to what caused this horrendous headache.

     3 hours of sleep and 3 doses of medication later I am finally feeling human.  The Migraine isn’t completely gone,  but what is left it is tolerable.  Today I was left with the Migraine hangover,  the dull ache that is left,  over my brow bone.  I thought maybe Yoga at the Y would be relaxing tonight and helpful.  I am not sure it helped,  but it didn’t make it worse. 
     One thing I do know for sure is that the lingering effects of this one will take days to leave,  and I am truly done with it.

    

     If I had any illusions that I was tethered to my cell phone those illusions came to a crashing halt on Friday afternoon.  I was on my way to the bank Friday and I had texted my boss to tell him I would be in after I was done.  I glanced down to see if he had responded and my phone was black.  I double tapped the screen to activate it,  all I got was the LG.. Life is Good logo.  Life was seriously not good.  My cell phone was not responding.  Trying not to panic,  I wedged it out of its Otter Box case (which is a feat in itself).  Then pried the case off and pulled the battery out,  waited a minute and popped the battery back in, nothing.  I repeated this 3 times with the same results.  By the end of the third sequence I was seriously pissed off and panicking a combination that is never good.
     I left the paperwork with the bank manager and went downstairs to my husbands shop.  Kyle repeated the process,  inserting his battery,  since we have the same phone.  I was tapping my foot the entire time and generally freaking out.  When it would not come to life for Kyle he handed it back to me and pronounced.  “It’s dead mom,  you wore it out,  it suffers from.. Over work and underpaid syndrome. 
       I called my boss via the landline when and  was as unimpressed as me.  The next call was to AT & T, my dear electronic was under warranty so a new one would be shipped.  I wouldn’t get it till Monday evening.  It was a long weekend without my beloved electronic friend.  I came to realize how dependent on the little beast I am.  No text,  email,  Facebook,  blogs,  words with friends,  Instagram,  or Google Hangouts.  It was a form of withdrawal, and it wasn’t fun. 

     With Super Tuesday occurring yesterday and Bernie Sanders taking 2nd place to HRC and Donald Trump keeping his commanding lead over both Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio I am having to face the facts that my politically ideology is not shared by the majority of my fellow American Citizens.  
     I really was  convinced that Trump would fizzle out months ago,  that his campaign would run its natural course and he would be the proverbial “flash in the pan”.  Unfortunately as the weeks and months have ticked by his campaign has gained momentum and his hate has grown even stronger.  He has said more outlandish and revolting things and yet his numbers have increased and his crowds have grown.
     There is a great quote that is often bastardized but I have included the original here.  “No one in this world as far as I know—and I have searched the records for years, and employed agents to help me—has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people. ” H. L.  Mencken In my thinking that quote sums up his campaign in a nutshell.  The  American people are buying his crap hook line and sinker, and he is a true embarrassment to the Republican Party.  That is saying a lot,  they don’t usually need any help to be embarrassed they do fine on their own,  but somehow they found him to do it for them this time.
     Now on the Democratic side HRC,  well I seem to be in the minority from the votes,  but I don’t really want another Clinton in the White House.  After all the flip flopping she has done and the Benghazi scandal she still walks around like she is heir apparent.  I am really at a loss.  

Somehow we have lost our way,  and I don’t know how to get the voting public to understand that.

   

     Oh that is so me,  from the time my feet hit the floor in the morning I am figuring out what I am having for breakfast,  then on to lunch  and dinner, with a few well placed snacks tossed in and depending on my mood maybe even some chocolate.  I can’t fathom people who just eat for pure sustenance and not for the enjoyment of food and people that “forget to eat”?  That is something I could never do anymore than I could forget to breathe. I am a Foodie,  pure and simple,  I love to cook, saute,  sear,  fry,  bake,  steam,  poach,  you name it,  I will try it!!!
     I have my list of favorite foods,  seafood,  pasta (you might think I was Italian not Irish) a good beef tenderloin,  a great steak,  Eggs Benedict,  and crusty bread.  And not much beats a fantastic rare burger with lettuce,  tomato,  mayo and some ketchup.  Cheesecake,  either plain or flavored,  good decadent chocolate cake with chocolate frosting tops the dessert list.  Who am I kidding if it is chocolate it tops the dessert list.
     All of these reasons are why I constantly fight the “Battle of The Bulge”  on a daily basis,  as a good friend of mine has been known to say.  “I can do some serious damage with a  fork”, that is why I have resigned myself to love my curves and love the gym.  Together we can make my love of food and the knowledge that I live to eat, not eat to live work.
#Blogging101

  

Today was the last day,  I dropped Connor off at Drivers Ed.  In just short of a month he will take the Permit test at the Massachusetts RMV, and then about 6 months after that they will give my  baby a driver’s license.  Where the hell did the time go?  I am sure that he was really just 5 a few months ago,  how is he going to be 16 years old?  My mom told me to hold on tight to them and don’t wish their lives away.  Stop wishing for them to sleep the night, go to pre-school, kindergarten, graduate from elementary school,  go to middle school and then on to high school.  I wish I had listened. 
     Don’t get me wrong, I love both of my boys,  actually young men in their own rights.  I just sometimes miss the little boys they were at times.  The boys who came in covered in mud from the Wiles household to show me whatever they had made and what kind of mess they were covered in.  Those are memories I will cherish forever.