Messed Up Holiday

     Thanksgiving is the holiday of family and togetherness.  No gifts exchanged, just good food, good friends and good times.  For me this year it was not to be. 

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     I woke up at 1 am Thursday morning with the most intense stomach pain, coupled with shivering and shaking.  By 7 am I had made more trips to the bathroom than I have counting appendages.  I had finally come to the conclusion that me riding 2.5 hrs to Connecticut was not feasible. 

     After discussing our options with my husband,  we decided that  they would go to my parents without me, taking the Broccoli Casserole and Apple Spice Cake with them. 

     I shipped my family off, took some tylenol and went back to bed.  I slept my day away,  wishing I was in Connecticut with my family but glad that I wasn’t spreading this crud any farther.
   
     By 7pm they were home with leftovers in tow and this morning has dawned with me 9lbs lighter,   not the way I wud have planned to lose it,  but oh well.

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Here We Go

  

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      This week starts the American Holiday Season.  Thanksgiving,  and then we will head on to Christmas.  As The Grinch was told “Christmas can come without boxes and bows”.  But Thanksgiving cannot come without food.
     Turkey,  some families add ham too, Mashed Potatoes, Sweet Potatoes, Stuffing, Turnip, Creamed Onions,  Green Bean Casserole, Broccoli and cauliflower Casserole with Bleu Cheese in our House, Cranberry Relish and Homemade Crescent Rolls.  Added to that for dessert,  Apple Spice Layer Cake with Citrus Spiced Cream football Frosting, Pumpkin Pie and Pumpkin Pie. 
     All of this goodness will be followed by cups of coffee,  mulled cider and good drinks.  Lots of laughter, good natured teasing,  trips down memory lane,  maybe some tears, and of course football. 🏈🏈

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     I truly love my family and I can’t wait to see them tomorrow,  I would be excited even without the food,  but the food sure doesn’t hurt.  😊

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Why Does This Hurt?

Β Β Β Β 

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     It should be no big surprise, even in death you are still playing favorites.Β  For as long as I can remember I was not among one of your favorites.  I wasn’t thin enough,  or quiet enough,  or girly enough,  or whatever enough.  There was always a reason that I didn’t measure up for you. 
     Finally somewhere along the line I stopped worrying, or maybe even trying to live up to your impossible standards.  At least I thought I gave up striving for your standards,  but it became obvious that was not true. 
     The little girl in me just wanted to be loved and cherished, something that was impossible for you to do.
     I find it ironic that one of the last things you said to me was “you look beautiful today”.  I honestly can’t remember you telling me that ever.  It was always,  you would look nice if… your hair was lighter,  you lost some weight, your skirt was shorter/longer etc. 
     I can’t change the past,  but what I can change is the way it affects me in the future.  As in I won’t let it affect me.  The past is the past and it will stay there. 
     I am a strong independent woman with a great close family that loves me,  and those are all the most important parts of the equation. 

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