Beautifully Broken

A simple Facebook interaction between Grieving Moms has brought me to this realization. We are all “Beautifully Broken”. We are all learning how to navigate this new world that we live in.

Some of us use therapy to navigate, some of us cry until it feels like our eyelashes will fall out, there may be screaming, drinking and even some smoking involved. Anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds (Valium, Xanax, etc) are often on board for when it feels like “the walls are caving in”.

But when it comes right down to it, we rely on ourselves, our family and the group of friends that we surround ourselves with. Our tribe, the people we know we can run to when times are tough, they don’t care if our mascara runs when we cry, we talk about our lost child endlessly, or just wanna talk about mundane things so maybe we don’t cry this time.

We are the Beautifully Broken Souls of Franklin County, and most specifically the Hill Towns. We have found each other with this common loss, living in an area so small it may feel like we live in each others pockets. At times that can be a bit claustrophobic, but in times like this, that closeness forges a bond that can’t be found anywhere else. A bond forged by the loss we never wanted, or expected, but it turned us into The Beautifully Broken Sisters of Franklin CountyπŸ’”πŸ’”β€οΈπŸ’™

Paying it Forward πŸ¦…πŸ”ŒπŸ’™πŸ’”

Tuesday I gave out the #3ConnorStrong Memorial Strong Scholarship at FCTS Awards Night for the second time. This year wasn’t as hard, that doesn’t mean it was easy, just not as hard. I rehearsed my speech at least 25 times to keep the tears in check. Wore a black dress with my favorite flip flops so I wouldn’t break my neck in case I had to walk down lots of bleachers to get to the podium. The last thing I wanted to do was slip and fall with a pair of 3″ heels and make a spectacle of myself.

This speech actually had a little bit of body to it, I spoke about Connor, his accident, subsequent death and love of the trade. How this scholarship is paying that love forward. Nate Smith, the young man that got this years scholarship is attending Bunker Hill Community College. In the Eversource Lineman Apprentice Program. I couldn’t think of anyone more deserving to get this years award.

Paying it forward is what makes this whole thing a little easier at this time of year. Making sure Connor’s legacy lives on, I know in my heart those of us who loved him with all of our hearts and souls won’t forget him. I just need to make sure that the rest of the world doesn’t either.