The phrase that “No man is an island” sprung to mind recently. I think that social media has made us a very judgmental society. Used to be that we had a core group of friends, mostly people that lived in our neighborhood, or at least in the same telephone area code. 

Now our circle has widened, to across the country and even around the world. With that widening comes the thinking that everyone must share the same thoughts, ideals and values.

That just isn’t true, and it is that thinking that makes many of us thing that we are an island. But not an enjoyable one, that consists of sun, sand, palm trees, cabana boys and drinks with little umbrellas.

The island that we end up on one is an island full of all of our emotions, whirling around us, like rain and snow. With a rocky shore and pounding surf, in effect keeping all others away. 

Social media can be a wonderful thing, but it can also turn on you in an instant. It can be an angel on one side of the coin and the other side holds a barbed devil. The only way to keep this devil at bay is to embrace the sand and palm trees, dance with the cabana boys and enjoy those fruity umbrella drinks. If you allow the driving rain and snow to take hold that rocky shore will take over, and that isolation will envelop you and the devil comes barbs and all.

One minute they are toddling behind you getting into everything. With the next blink they are getting on the school bus to go to kindergarten. If you are anything like me, and they are your baby there tears involved that day (lots of them).

It seemed like there were years of baseball practices, and games, and Tournament Ball with travel all over the state (at god awful times of the day, in any kind of weather). 

Then some friends convinced you that football would be cool to play. That was 4 years of nail biting and terror for mom. You only got bumped and bruised, but I was glad when u stopped playing.

Then came transfer to Tech, with the Chip boots and all the other accessories. You were headed towards adulthood at a breakneck pace and there was nothing I could do to slow the hands of time.

The Driving Permit was next, with the required amount of road time and classroom time, followed by a Drivers License. Who gave you permission to grow up so fast, not me that is for sure!! Even before you had your license you bought a car, a sporty little Black Mazda 3. Snazzy little car, that you take everywhere , and now that your 6 months is up, you can take others with you.

This past Friday night I realized how grown up you were. You put on a tux, dress shoes and got Jordan’s corsage ready. You looked like a million bucks. As we headed out the door, it hit me, you were really going to prom, and you were pretty grown up. The 2 of you looked stunning, and I made it through a thousand pictures with no tears.

I was diagnosed with a “Frozen Shoulder” about 6 weeks ago. Knows in medical lingo as Adhesive Capulitis. Truth is that I was diagnosed 6 weeks ago, but I have been suffering with this debilitating pain since November of 2016. I just assumed (wrongly) that I had pulled a muscle or just tweaked something and it wud resolve itself.

I tried RICE. Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation. Although it is a little difficult to elevate your shoulder. But I successfully did everything else. With really no success, but I kept trying, refusing to give into the pain. 

Finally I went to the doctor at the beginning of January and was diagnosed with Bursitis of the shoulder joint, prescribed Naproxen and told to rest the joint as much as possible. It did nothing, but make my stomach unhappy. 

After the Naproxen was gone, I used OTC NSAID’S and still no change. Finally 6 weeks I made another appointment. This time for a cortisone shot. This time my PCP diagnosed it as Frozen Shoulder, gave me the Cortisone Shot and sent me on my way.

The shot helped for abt 2 weeks. And now the pain is back with a vengeance. I have done my research, and the general consensus is that you just have to let this awful thing run its course. Ice works great, sometimes Cortisone shots do, Manipulation under Anesthesia, Hydrdialation. Have all been thrown about as options, but mostly it is just wait.

Waiting is something I am not good at, I want to snap my fingers and wake up with it gone, but the chances of that seem pretty slim.

If this new administration had a tag line it would be “Alternative Facts, use them, embrace them.” I for one will not use them or embrace them. I will call them what they are a LIE! As a person who compulsively seeks the truth, these type of  “facts” offend me.

The most recent “Alternative Fact” laid down by Kellyanne Conway was about the Bowling Green Massacre. The Massacre she claimed was never covered by the Press. It never existed, hence why it was never covered by any media outlet. As a compulsive truth seeker, I went into research mode, Google and Snopes are my friends. 2 men were arrested in Bowling Green Kentucky for possessing illegal weapons and being involved in IED incidents in their home country. Hmm, no massacre there. 

Once Ms. Conway was confronted with the truth she began to backtrack quicker than an Olympic Figure Skater. Saying that she misspoke and that it “could have been a massacre” but it was stopped when the Iraqi nationals were arrested before they could do anything.

Next came the 7 countries that are on the travel ban. I find it quite interesting that none of those 7 countries have any Trump Hotels or Trump Casinos in them. Yet if you are Saudi Arabia that has Trump ties you are all set. This entire administration talks in circles, circles that make my head spin. They make their own discriminatory practices as they pertain to international affairs based on how it will effect Trump Industries. 

Need I remind anyone that is why he was supposed to divest himself of his business holdings, so there was no “conflict of interest.” I predict he will never do this, nor will we ever see the release of his Tax Returns. 

I also predict that Melania and Baron will never leave the comforts of Trump Tower to reside at The White House. She will use these 4 years as an un-official separation and after the 4 year Presidential term, she will become the 3rd ex Mrs. Trump. 

If he even lasts 4 years as our 45th President, which I don’t anticipate will happen. I am in the camp that believes he will be impeached long before his term is up. Leaving us with Pence as President and Ryan as Vice President. Those are scary propositions to me.

I see Trump as a puppet, a puppet with no political knowledge that operates like a ping-pong ball with a serious case of ADHD. Bouncing from one issue to another. Neither solving anything or making any true changes. On the other hand with Pence and Ryan at the helm that is an equation that scares me. They have the political know how, but not the common sense. With any of these fools at the helm of our country I am scared. 

This morning it is -4, better known as bone chilling ass freezing cold. In my book anything under 20*F is just COLD, once it gets that cold I stop paying attention. I have seriously begun to consider that New England is not the place for me to live. But that is not what this entry is about, it is about the fact that a -4 temperature on the thermometer results in either a 2 hour delay or a school closing. Really??? I will admit I am 48 years old, so it has been years since I was in elementary or high school. But I do have a child on there now and friends with kids there too.

 

When I was in school, ages ago, before TV and modern conveniences as my kids will say. When winter came things were different, you bundled up to WALK to the bus stop. Hank Quinlon drove that yellow Dufour School bus to the stop and you got on. You found a seat and sat down for the duration of the trip.  School was delayed if there was over 10″ of snow or a crap ton of ice. 3″ of snow didn’t even warrant a thought, and early dismissals for snow were downright unheard of. They had us there and we were there until the day was over. We are New Englanders, hold my coffee, while I navigate this snow drift, was the common thought, and still is for many of us.

We knew what hats, gloves, mittens and scarves were. Heavy jackets and snow pants till we looked like the bundled up Michelin Man.  Boots and ugh those liners made of Wonder Bread bags to keep your feet warm and dry. We may not have liked it, but we endured it, and I think it made us hearty souls.  Something that I am not sure that this generation is learning with late openings for cold and 3″ of snow. I just wish they were a little more like us.

 

 

As many of you may know I am a ResearchDiva or a Google Queen. If I don’t know the answer I will research or hunt until I find out what it is. Going hand in hand with that is the fact that I tend to be verbose, unable to define the word “IT” in under 400 words or less. Both of these ideas became apparent last night when my 19 year old asked me if it was illegal to burn an American Flag?, and could President Elect Trump jail an offender or deport an American Born citizen for doing so?

Enter Google… From the online Law Dictionary

1. “Currently, flag burning is not illegal in the United States.  The Supreme Court of the United States in its decision from 1969 has ruled that the burning of the flag is protected by the First Amendment. However, the person who burnt the flag can be found guilty of a misdemeanor for starting a fire without a permit.” 
2. “Natural-born U.S. citizens may not have their citizenship revoked against their will, but may choose to renounce their citizenship on their own.”

The above being said, I don’t believe that Flag Burners are right or correct in their actions, but they are protected. In the current climate there would be an awful lot of prisons full of people accused of starting a fire without a permit. I think we have better things to do with our time and criminal justice resources. As for the second point, he isn’t going to be able to revoke anyone’s citizenship for it either.

He is full of hot air and bluster, carrying on with his Twitter account to his followers because it seems like a good idea at the time. I wish he would really think before he opens his mouth or lets his fingers do the walking. This country was founded on the ability to protest, I am sorry that he doesn’t like it. But we do not work for him, we are not members of the Trump Payroll. Therefore we have the right to speak against him. As generations before us have spoken out against presidents that they did not agree with.

That is what makes this country great, the ability to speak our mind and have differing points of view. If you plan to take away that right you have another thing coming. Never Mind the 2nd Amendment and the Right to Bear Arms. How about the 1st Amendment and the Right to Free Speech? That means way more to me than any gun or rifle. The right to speak my mind, have freedom of the press, and the right for different religions to practice freely in this country, all of them, not just the ones that you and I agree with.

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.- Martin Niemoller

I am afraid, afraid of what the next 4 years will bring in the country that I love, the country that I was raised in, the country that I call home. I joked before this election that if I didn’t like the outcome I was fleeing to Canada or someplace else. That is not the case, I will stay and fight, fight for the country that I believe in. I will stand up for what I believe is right. I will speak up, speak up for the melting pot that this country is. This is what we are, and what we always have been, and 4 years of HIM, will NOT change that!!!

Edmund Burke said it as well: “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing”. I for one will do something, whether it is to lobby my local representatives or work hard at the local level for what I believe in, you can bet your sweet ass I will do something!!

The night of the election I was pacing and generally worrying myself to death, I was on the phone with my dad and he said “there is nothing you can do about it now, we just have to let it play out, just turn the channel and find something else to watch”. My comment was “who made me this political? Who taught me to care as much as I do? You did!! And now I care about this, it is my future!”

As I watch his cabinet take shape I shake my head in disbelief and horror. At the same time realizing that there are people who voted for him. The “Anus Mouthed Leathery Tangerine” as the Liberal Redneck had termed him.  He and his group of friends and cronies scare the living shit out of me. He sounds to me like a damn dictator, he has way too much money and the ability to throw it around with abandon.

He has tapped into the hate that has been bubbling under the surface for the last 8 years. The racism, and the redneck, good-ole boy network. Making them all excited that someone was gonna bring back those high paying jobs that were shipped overseas. Did no one notice his suits, ties and all his daughters clothing line is made in CHINA? He ran on a platform of LIES!!!  As a smart, educated, liberal woman. I think it is time we shut that good-ole boy network down.

 

I went to sleep the night of the 2016 Presidential Election full of hope. Hope that we as a nation we would have shattered the glass ceiling, hope that we would have set this country onto her feet again, dusted her off so that she may strut her stuff. Instead what I feel is fear. Fear mixed with equal parts of shame and dread. Fear of what same future holds, shame at what some of my country people did, and what the Electoral College did, and dread at what those actions will bring.

I am a woman who came of age in the 80’s, when the first generation of “Yuppie” Women were told we could do and be anything we wanted to be. We could work, have families, children, powerful careers. In short, Have it ALL!!. Or we could forego the family for a career if that was what we chose, there was no shame or judgement. We could clear our won path and make our own way. Roe v. Wade was part of that great shift, women had full control over our bodies, we could make reproductive decisions, we had access to birth control, money and in some ways power. Roe v. Wade has been slowly whittled away, state by state, as the Religious Right believes that abortion is a Religious and a Political decision not a personal or a medical one.

In the past decade my friends in the LGBT community have fought their own battles. Battles to love their own way, to end discrimination in the workplace, to adopt children as a couple. to marry and have that marriage validated and recognized in every state in the union if the relocate. Finally on July 26, 2015 that became the law of the land. LGBT couples rushed to marry in every state that had denied them the right before. As a resident of Massachusetts LGBT couples had enjoyed that right for many years, but if they relocated there was no guarantee their marriage would be recognized in another state. A fact that I find both reprehensible and sad. Who you love is not a choice, it is biology, pure and simple.

I have tried to be upbeat and positive and not mourn the choice of this election, and wait to see how things have played out. As President Elect Trump has announced 2 of his cabinet members that positivity and patience has begun to wane. Trump has announced his Chief Strategist-Stephen Bannon. A man who is best known as a White Nationalist, an unabashed Anti-Semite and a racist, he also has has published writings that are very hateful to American Core Values. He is the one who scares me the most, who espouses my fear the most. He reflects everything that I didn’t want about a Trump Presidency. A man who believes it is his way or no way. A man who has more in common with Rush Limbaugh than any Political Moderate. This announcement was followed with his Chief of Staff as Reince Preibus. The current RNC Chairman, is the appointee who is trying to calm us all down. He is the peacemaker, not that I see any peace on the horizon in this presidency.

I am trying not to be an alarmist, I really am, I am trying to let things play out, honestly I am. I was raised to listen to all points of view before you jump to any conclusions. But my point of view is this: the amount of hate and discontent that has been bubbling just below the surface in this country has finally found a voice. It found a voice in the form of an Old White Millionaire that promised to Restore Jobs, Deport Immigrants, and Make America like it used to be in the Ozzie and Harriet Days. I happen to be of the mindset that things in the 50’s were neither glorious nor wonderful and those days aren’t gonna be so great.

 

So in that notion I am not gonna mourn this election, or protest the results because neither will any good. I am gonna find the best outlet I can and I am gonna fight. I am gonna fight for the continuation of Roe v. Wade, fight for my friends in the LGBT community and fight to keep the idea of Affordable Care alive. We need all need access to Health Care, not just the ones that can afford the best care, everyone does. No one should be forced to choose between medication or rent. I was raised to stand up for what i believe in, and these are things that I believe in. No one will tell me different, and I dare you to debate me. Bring it on!!!

     This has probably been the most contentious election that I can remember. Mud has been slung much earlier than normal and the personal insults are highly disturbing. These insults come from both sides, neither is immune to them.

     What I find highly disturbing is the most recent remarks by Trump about how he would fight to remove womens access to “Late Term Abortions “, calling them inhumane and barbaric. He has little right to make that assumption. He is neither a woman nor part of the medical field.  A Late Term Abortion is not because a woman forgot about her pregnancy or just changed her mind. It is because there is something drastically wrong with the fetus that can not be remedied. 

   The Republican Party has been summarily stripping away access to Roe v. Wade since it was passed in 1973, and as women we need to stand up to them.  I had a friend of a fb friend tell me that my body doesn’t belong to me, it belongs to God. Therefore I can’t chose what to do with it. That is eerily scary and reminiscent of the Stepford Wives. 

     My body, my decision, my choice, and that choice is a Democratic Vote in November. Sending a clear message. We have fought to hard to get here, and we have miles left to go, We are not letting you stop us now.

     Not by a man who looks like he got in a fight with a spray tan machine, while arguing with his toupee maker. I think I will pass on that one.

I know that feeling all to well. When you feel like you are the “fat friend”, the one with the great personality that has everything going for them, but the rocking size 8 body that you want so damn much. And that you have tried every damn thing and diet that has come down the pike, eaten barely nothing for days, exercised until every muscle you own screams. And still the scale refuses to budge, along with the tape measure. So you just give in and eat a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. I have been there!! 

Finally after researching the crap out of it I dipped my toe into the Low Carb/High Fat (further known as LCHF) lifestyle. And damn it, it worked. The pounds began to come off, it took a bit for my brain to get with the program. To understand that Carbs are the enemy not Fat Grams. But once both my body and my brain became Keto Adapted, it was easy. I learned to adapt favorite recipes, combat constipation and realize that my body doesn’t know natural sugar in fruit from table sugar from sugar in bread, rice or my personal favorite pasta. 

I love bacon, steak, sausage and chicken thighs. I have re-trained my family to accept what is for dinner and deal with it. My cholesterol is great, so don’t even give me the spiel abt how it will raise those numbers. My body is healthy and it is working for me. 

I may never be a Size 8 again, at 5’9″ tall and with my build a size 8 with the weight that it brings is kind of unrealistic and might make me look pretty undernourished and sickly. I will b happy when I get to a 12 and securely out of the Plus Size realm. Right now I am sitting at a standard 16, a size I haven’t seen in 3 years, with a bra size that I haven’t seen in twice as many years. I am also learning not to be scale obsessed, to be more concerned about things that fit and how they look.

Thinking Outside The Box of the Standard American Diet has led me on a journey to be happier and healthier than I have been in years!😊