Once I was old enough to figure it out I believed that Valentines Day was a made up holiday. Made up by Hallmark, FTD and Nestle to gain revenue with sappy card , overpriced flowers and chocolate sales. Now I adore flowers, the quickest way to my heart is to bring me a bouquet of flowers. My cousin Cindy Dufour always said her sister Kim and I were Miss Hall Prep School wanna be’s. We attracted the guys that brought the flowers and drove the fancy cars and wore the fancy clothes, she was right!!💐🌹❤️💕👞👔

I still want flowers, but on Valentines Day, roses are hugely overpriced, and Chocolate is a awful for my low carb lifestyle. This year what I want and need is love, and I have it. I have true friends, I have husband who holds me when I cry and sob and rage at the world and how unfair it is. An amazing 21 year old son, who is wise beyond his years. I will take the credit for that wiseness and how mature he is for his age. I have Connor’s amazing girlfriend Jordan, who is my connection to him, I have Connor’s friends who constantly remind me of what a fantastic kid he was.

I have a job that I love, with a company that I love. A boss that is a fantastic guy, who understands that I have good days, bad days and days that I can’t even get out of bed. I can’t ask for more than that.

To be honest in my heart of hearts I ask for more than that on a daily basis. I ask the why question over and over. With no real answer, I know I am not the only one. Anyone who is a member of this crappy club asks the same question. There is no answer, and there never will be, but it doesn’t stop me from asking just the same.